Systematic Student:
Contemporary

The free-verse poetry is as powerful as even, invoking images and emotions within the reader easily. I've read several authors who use verse to tell their stories, and none of them are as powerful writers as Hopkins. The intensity she writes with with astound you. It is painful, stark, real. This much honest emotion in a story takes my breath away, even as is breaks my heart. None of these children have had an easy time with life and the legacy Kristina has left for them is heartbreak, addiction and destruction. Not very hopeful, is it?

Life is never all about you. There will always be other people hurt or affected by our decisions, and I think it is important to realize this. You are always able to chose your own actions, but you do not get to chose your consequences for yourself or those around you. I once again commend Hopkins for an amazingly powerful story, one that will stay with me for a long time.

Looking for Alaska by John Green is a story of friendship, betrayal, grief, happiness, hope, despair, laughter, tears, and growing up. I could go on and on about how many facets of life this book embodies, but I think you get the point.

Miles, Chip and Alaska were perfectly drawn characters. We were able to see both their strengths and their weaknesses, their perfections and their flaws. These characters each have so many dimensions to them, it's hard to believe they aren't actually real. Sometimes they get along, sometimes they make good choices, and other times they act recklessly, with a complete disregard for the rules and their own well being.

This is definitely not a perfectly wrapped story, decorated with ribbons, and wrapped with a bow, so if that's the story you're looking for, look elsewhere. However, if you are interested in reading a story that is going to alter the way you view your world, I highly, highly recommend this book.

The characters in this story are really stupid at times. But they learn. Miles went to boarding school, searching for his 'great perhaps'. He's lived a fairly boring life, nothing exciting ever happens to him, and he's looking for something, but he doesn't know quite what that something is. When he gets to school, he meets his new roommate, Chip, and one of his best friends, a beautiful and exciting girl named Alaska.

John Green shows an amazing talent for writing with this story. He manages to create in Miles a character who is intelligent, and able to think deep and philosophically without talking over the reader, or condescending to them. Miles thinks a lot about what he's learning, especially in his world religion course, and because he is our narrator, we hear a lot about what he's thinking and feeling. But, I never once felt preached to or overwhelmed.

This is a story about the hard parts of growing up. It's a story about those things every parent wishes didn't happen. But these things do happen and to ignore them, brush them under the rug and act as if they are not real is doing everyone a disservice. I makes kids feel like they are alone and that no one else has ever felt the way they do. But this story lets us know that there are other people out there who can relate to us, and that it's okay to hurt, okay to cry and okay to move on.

John Green, I think you are a brilliant man and I cannot wait to pick up your next story.

*Disclaimer: I received this book through One ARC Tours.

Losing Faith by Denise Jaden is a story of life and death, pain and hope, and friendship. Brie hasn't been close to her sister Faith for several years. Their parents are deeply religious, and Faith is a fervent believer as well. Brie is more interested in whether she really wants to spend alone time with her boyfriend than listening to people talk God, and it's caused some tension between family members.

Then Faith dies. Brie feels like she's losing ground, and there's no one for her to talk to. People at school don't know how to deal with her (what do you say to someone who's been that close to death?) her boyfriend is more interested in her body and her parents are so wrapped up in their own grief there is no room for Brie.

Then, Tessa starts talking to Brie. She's the tough chick, always dresses in black, scowls at everyone and seems more than willing to beat you up. Brie's always been terrified of her, so she's definitely wary when Tessa starts being, almost... nice. Turns out, there's a lot more to Tessa than meets the eye and she's the only one there for Brie as she starts getting closer to the answers about why her sister died.

The characters in this novel were amazing. I was so impressed with how Jaden wrote these characters. Because they are real. I believed in them. They didn't always act how I wanted them to, but I never felt that anything they did was really out of character. The only character I didn't fully believe was Faith, but I won't tell you why because that would spoil the book, and she's dead most of the time, so I can overlook that. Tessa is tough. She doesn't take crap from anyone, and because she's been so isolated from people for so long, she's really abrupt and doesn't really know how to communicate. And she stayed that way. Too often in books we have the tough guy/girl who just needs that one friend to open them up to show that, Hey! They really are totally great after all. But, most people who have gone years without much in the way of interpersonal communication have a lot to learn about being with other people, and it's definitely not something you learn overnight.

The only character I wasn't satisfied with was Pastor Scott, the youth pastor. I really felt that Jaden did him a disservice in her description. Maybe the problem is with me, but I totally kept waiting for it to be revealed that he was a creep of some sort or another, and every time he was mentioned, I kept waiting for the other shoe to drop. But, even though he's described in a way that makes me feel like he's creepy, he isn't. He's actually pretty minor.

The characters in this story were all developed really well, and their relationships with each other were intricate, and believable. I'm sure it's not surprising, given the nature of the YA coming of age novel, but there was a lot of growing up done in this book and it wasn't a disappointment. They grew as people in a believable way, enough to leave you satisfied that these people will continue to develop into great people you'd actually want to spend time with, but not so much that it leaves you disbelieving it actually happened.

The story also makes you think about what people are like inside. It's scary when you realize that someone who seems normal and likable is all kinds of crazy underneath. This is realistic fiction — something that could happen to any of us, but also something that I wouldn't wish upon anyone. It's definitely a book to make you think, to make you wonder, and one that I'll be thinking about for a while yet. And, I'm very interested in what Jaden does next.

Girl, Stolen by April Henry is the story of Cheyenne, a young girl accidentally kidnapped when someone steals the SUV she's sleeping in. She's sick, (pneumonia) and she's blind.

I can't imagine how terrifying that would be. Being kidnapped would be horrifying enough, but to be blind as well?! I can't imagine. I thought this was handled very well by the author. Cheyenne's emotional state when she realized she was being kidnapped seemed very real. She tried threats, she tried bargaining, and she tried begging. She was scared, but she's also a smart girl, and she thought things through — used her brains.

It was also interesting to watch Griffin's character, and discover more about him. He's the boy that takes the SUV, but right from the beginning, it's pretty obvious that he's not an inherently bad kid. There are outside influences on Griffin that seem to be shaping his behavior, and that broke my heart, just the tiniest bit.

Overall, reading this book I was more impressed with the characters than I was the story itself. Large parts of the story were just a little bit too unbelievable. It was hard to suspend my disbelief long enough to take what was happening to or between the characters seriously. However, I thought this was an interesting look into human characteristics. It's often hard to know who we will be in different situations, and how we would react to them. April Henry has us look into what circumstances might make of us. Griffin doesn't have to be a bad kid, he's just desperate for his father's love and approval. Cheyenne wasn't always blind but once she got over the initial shock and depression, she didn't let it keep her down, and she learned to live around the blindness. It makes me wonder how I'd react to various stimuli.

And, I also have to add that I loved the climax of the story! It was very well done, and the only part of the story I found to be compulsively readable. It was handled wonderfully, and was just realistic enough to have been possible.

Overall, this book was an enjoyable read, but not one I found to be terribly memorable. It's a book I'm not going to remember much about down the road, but it's that book that will come to mind at odd moments and make me stop, to think and contemplate on life.

*Disclaimer: I received this book through We Love YA Tours.

Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins is a fun contemporary romantic YA. I don't read a lot of fiction where the primary plot line revolves around romance, but like watching a chick flick, every once in a while it just hits the spot. And this book is like that.

I felt really bad for Anna when the book first started. Her dad is a best selling author who has decided that to impress his buddies he needs a bigger profile, and more pretentious things to talk about. So, he decides he is going to send Anna to an American boarding school in Paris, France. Without asking her how she feels about it. For her senior year. Anna already has problems with her dad, considering he walked out on them when her brother was a baby and now sends money and not much else and this definitely makes things worse. Her mom can't help her and Anna is bitter, scared and lonely when she first gets to Paris. Her meeting with next door neighbor helps bring her into a new circle of friends, and give her some bearings and this is where her story starts.

The characters are very well written, with multi-faceted personalities, flaws, shortcomings, and positive traits in a believable combination. None of these characters are perfect, all of them make stupid mistakes and bad choices, but they all also have many redeeming qualities too. They not only have personality traits, they also have hobbies, preferences and quirks. Like Anna who is almost obsessively neat and absolutely adores movies, especially the classics. These characters were written as if they were real people. Because the characters were real, the relationships between the characters also felt very real. I hate reading books where the romantic connection consists of a glance across a room, instant hormonal craze, one conversation and BAM! I'm head over heals in love. Things like that don't actually happen. You can't be in love with someone that fast. What you can be however, is in lust. Which is what Anna is when she first meets beautiful boy Etienne St. Clair.

But, St. Clair has a long term girl friend, is being crushed on by a mutual friend and is therefore totally off limits. So, she thinks he's totally hott, but doesn't try to make anything happen. They become friends and over time she realizes that Etienne is her closest friend. It get complicated when emotional attachments start to muddy the waters, but Anna is trying really hard to keep her head up, and not cross that boundary line. They toe the line, they nudge it, but they never cross it. Until they do...

Although mostly lighthearted in tone and topic, there are serious elements to the story as well. Both Anna and Etienne have problems with their fathers that need resolution, and the book brings up the topics of pain, death, loss and betrayal. It's a credit to the author that each of these topics was handled in a realistic way that enhanced rather than detracted from the story line, and didn't bog the story down. I've read too many books that are supposed to be about one thing and end up getting caught in the black abyss that is the sub plots.

I loved this book. I thought it was scads of fun to read, and I'm beyond desperate to visit Paris now. It's always been high up in my top 5 places to visit list, but after reading this book I feel like I needed to be there yesterday. I loved that the author included a lot of touristy sites, as well as places a little more off the beaten path. It made me feel like I could really be there. And man, do I want to go hard core!

Although not my usual fare, this is definitely a book I'm glad I read, and one that I wouldn't mind reading again. I was very excited to hear that Perkins has two companion novels in the works. I'm glad that we aren't getting a continuation of Anna's story, because it is over, but that there will be more coming soon from Ms. Perkins. Yay for Anna!:)

*Disclaimer: I received this book through Around the World Tours.

Just Listen is my second attempt at a Sarah Dessen book. (Read my review for This Lullaby) I liked This Lullaby okay, but wasn't wowed by it the way so many people seemed to be. But, I did enjoy it.

Just Listen was better. I felt more of a connection with these characters, and I can most definitely see myself reading more by Sarah Dessen in the near future.

Owen was a great character. The boy has got a lot of bottled up anger, but he's got a huge capacity for love as well. Watching him open up was wonderful. I think he was my favorite character in this story.

Annabel was also a great character, and it was painful watching her struggle. You have a pretty good idea the whole time why she's struggling so much, but that doesn't make it any easier to read about. She is hurting, and distrusting, but she slowly begins to open up to Owen, and allow him a place in her life. I thought they were great together, and I really wanted for things to work out.

This book really reminded me of Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson, and I think that is a weakness of this story. Not because Just Listen isn't powerful or important, but because I believe Speak to be more so, and I read it first. That being said, I do honestly believe that Just Listen is an important story, one that needed to be told, and one that will touch just as many people as Speak has. Speak is powerful in its simplicity and sparseness, but Just Listen offers us a deeper look into the characters and their relationships with each other, not just focusing on the main character.

Music plays a hugely important role in Owen's life, and as they grow closer, it begins to change Annabel as well. This is a story that will reach certain people and that makes me truly happy, because people need to know that life gets better, that there can be an end to pain, that sometimes, all you have to do is be willing to listen.

Fixing Delilah is so much more than it appears. If this book is anything to judge by, Sarah Ockler is a writer to watch out for because she has an incredible ability to form realistic and wonderful characters, relationships and settings. I haven't believed so much in the actions of the characters I was reading about in a long time. I have been planning to read Twenty Boy Summer for a while now, but after reading this book, it's definitely higher up on my tbr now.

Delilah used to be a good girl, who got good grades and never got into trouble, the same way she used to be close to her mom. But her mom's job is demanding, and over the years, they spend less and less time together until all they seem to do it fight. And, Delilah is facing down a whole bunch of crap at school that she can't seem to get a handle on, and no one seems like who they are suppose to be anymore.

Delilah has legitimate problems at school and home and she reacts the only way she knows how. I was impressed by the way Ockler handled this. In order for Delilah to need 'fixing' she had to have some issues to begin with. I've read too many books in my life where the author gives us a 'troubled' teen complete with the stereotypical problems that are used to completely explain away and excuse bad behavior until some easy and magical fix comes along (like a new boyfriend...) . But Ockler never does that, not with any of the problems she sets up for her characters. She does give us reasons for the behaviors, but she never once treats them like an excuse. They are the catalyst, and perhaps the cause, but she always lets us know that her characters chose what their effect would be. I never felt like Ockler took the easy way out. I never once felt cheated as a reader.

I thought that Ockler was able to create a very believable family dynamic and each of the relationships in this book were truly great. I can't say enough times how believable I found this story to be. Her relationship with Patrick was perfect — a childhood friend who maybe, just might start to become a little bit more. Emily was a great addition as well, a friend for Delilah when she desperately needed one. Even her memories showed relationships, her loving grandfather, distant grandmother and her imagined connection to the father she never knew.

Both individually and in connection to others, Delilah was a very real character to me. I felt her pain and her happiness, despair and hope.

This was a strong read, one I highly recommend. It answers each question it brings up satisfactorily without over-exposing. This book reminds me once again why I really do prefer contemporary fiction. If Twenty Boy Summer is anywhere near as good as this was, Sarah Ockler will land on my instant to-read list forever.

*Disclaimer: I received this book through Around the World Tours.

Revolution by Jennifer Donnelly is a vivid and captivating book filled with feeling. If you haven't yet read anything by Donnelly, I seriously think you are missing out, and I strongly recommend you fix that. Now.

Revolution is the story of Andi, an intelligent, talented girl who should have her whole future ahead of her. She's always been smart, has done well in school and is a gifted musician — able to play guitar and write her own music. But, her younger brother died in an accident about a year ago and Andi blames herself. Overwhelmed by grief and guilt, Andi loses focus on everything but her music. Her mom is immobilized by grief, scarcely able to function, and her dad, who has never been around much, retreats even further.

When her father forces her to accompany him to Paris, as a way to rescue her slipping grades, Andi is angry and can think of nothing more than getting back to New York. But then she discovers a journal, hidden in a guitar case that might date back to the French Revolution, and her world changes.

I was blown away by this book. The writing is intense and powerful, and Andi's pain practically screamed from the pages. Her depression and detachment from life was so real, and so perfectly portrayed that I found myself experiencing everything right along with her. But even more than just experiencing it with her, Andi was so well written, and so real a character to me that I found myself knowing how Andi would feel or react to a situation as it happened, before we, as readers, were given her reaction. I knew her. I don't think I've ever felt such a strong connection to a character before, but it was thrilling.

The only thing that really reaches Andi is her music and this is where she goes when life becomes too much for her, often playing her guitar until her fingers bleed. She is constantly listening to music, both classical and contemporary and she lets that heal the outward hurt. Nothing can touch that empty place inside her, but she seems content to let that fester, although that 'contentment' might be more a side effect of the anti-depressants she eats like candy than anything real on her part.

It was powerful watching Andi struggle between life and death, both metaphorically and realistically. There is more than one aborted suicide attempt, and they start right at the beginning of the story. She isn't sure if she wants to die, but she also isn't sure she wants to continue living.

Her experiences in Paris help to open her eyes to life, and help her to understand that although her grief will always be a part of her, it does not have to completely define her. Both the journal she discovers of a young girl living through the French Revolution, and Virgil, a boy she met while joining a local band for a few songs help to bring Andi back from the depression she's been drowning in.

I liked the sections with the journal. It was well written and engaging, but Alexandrine was never a real person for me the way she was for Andi, and the way Andi was for me. I don't mean to be derogatory toward them at all, because they are an essential part of the story, and still beautifully written. But, they were always sections of a journal, fascinating, but removed from me. I doubt I would have paid as much attention to this if my connection to Andi hadn't been so strong.

Virgil was wonderful. Although he doesn't have a lot of actual face time throughout the story, he is in no way a minor character, but neither is he the focus of the story, which was nice. (I'm a little bored with the books right now that seem to be all about the romance, even when other points should be more important. Virgil was great and I enjoyed watching their relationship develop. It was pretty realistic. They met, and are attracted to each other. Andi does think about him a lot over the next few days, but isn't obsessed, and doesn't believe herself to be in love. He's just on her mind, because it's a new-almost relationship.

This book was almost perfect. The only reason I'm not calling this book Basically Amazing is because of climax. It's the part of the summary that reads, "on a midnight journey through the catacombs of Paris, Alexandrine’s words transcend paper and time, and the past becomes suddenly, terrifyingly present."
Take from that what you will/what you can. I won't spoil it for you. I had my thoughts on what that might mean when I picked up the book, and was a little disappointed to realize which of my theories was correct. It didn't work quite as well for me as the rest of the story.

However, Andi is one of the strongest characters I've ever come across, and this is most definitely a book I'm going to have on my 'keep forever' shelf. It deserves to be read again and again, because I imagine there will be new things waiting for me every time.

*UPDATE — This is one of those books that refuses to let go of a person. So... I'm updating my previous rating from Loved it, but to BASICALLY AMAZING!:) Seriously — GO READ THIS BOOK!!

*Disclaimer: I received this book through Around the World Tours.

Love, Inc. by Yvonne Collins & Sandy Rideout was such a fun read. I loved it! It was just exactly what I needed. A lot of cute and funny with just enough seriousness and depth tossed in that I didn't find myself bored or rolling my eyes.

Zahara was a great character. She is intelligent, motivated and loving, but she's got a lot to learn about life as well. I thought that the authors here gave us a great mixture of confidence and uncertainty. Zahara is in high school, which is always rough. But, add in that it's a brand new high school, which means she needs all new friends and her parents are going through a separation and it's easy to see why she's having a hard time, and why she's so happy to spend time with Rico, her new boyfriend.

I loved watching Zahara try to regain control of her world. She tends to utilize extreme thinking, swinging from one extremity to the other swiftly, which I thought was perfectly suited to her character. One of my favorite moments was when she decided she was going to take control of her parenting, demote her parents to a back seat role, and just not tell them.:)

When her parents force her into group therapy for kids whose families are going through a split, she's not expecting to gain anything from the 'experience'. But instead of spending a miserable hour with a bunch of weirdos once a week, Zahara discovers two of the best friends a girl could have — and who knew?! The three girls are, at first glance, completely opposite and ill suited for friendship. Zahara, Syd and Kali each have their own issues to work through, but when they realize that the same guy has been playing all three of them, they decide to work out at least one of their issues together, and all sorts of wonderful mayhem ensues. And can I just add that I love the idea of 'framily'? It just worked!

I'll admit that there were times when the plot was a little predictable. I saw several big events coming from a long way off, but I found myself completely okay with that. I never knew exactly how the events would develop and I was enjoying the characters so much I was completely okay with knowing a bit of what's coming up.

I think I've heard mention of a sequel to this in the works, and I have mixed feelings about it. I can see where the authors have room for a sequel, and I even think I know a few of the things that might happen. On the one hand, I definitely feel like this novel could easily stand alone, and a large part of me feels that it should be left to stand alone. I got a great sense of closure and ending from the story, and believe that things are going to work out well for these great people, but that actually needing to read about how they get there would ruin it for me.
The other part of me would love to read what else these girls get themselves into, and how they work out more of what's got them down. And really, it's not like they actually learned their lessons the first time around.:)
I'm sure I'll end up reading the sequel if what I've heard is true, and there really are plans for the second. I can only hope I like the sequel as much I enjoyed the first.

*Disclaimer: I received this book through Around the World Tours.

Room by Emma Donoghue is a hard book for me to review. Because really, I just want to spout out random parts of this book that make it so great before just sighing at you and telling you to go read it yourself, because it's kind of a book that just needs to be experienced. But, I won't just blabber on at you.

So Room. It's narrated by Jack, a sweet, smart and charming just turned 5 year old whose whole world are the four walls of Room and it's contents. The only person he's ever seen or spoken to is Ma, although Old Nick is probably real too (but not real real).

I was very impressed with Jack and his voice. I've spent a lot of time around little kids at all stages of life and development, and most of the time, Jack is very much a five year old. The connections he makes, and the way he forms understandings is very typical of five year olds, as is the way he names things. Each wall is named (Door Wall etc), he sleeps in Wardrobe, eats at Table, etc. He does have a rather extensive vocabulary, but to me, that makes perfect sense. Ma has only Jack to talk to all day, and let me tell you — Baby talk gets old really fast. Ma mentions at one point that Jack has already heard every story that she knows, which means they talk a lot, and Jack is surrounded by words. Numerous studies have shown that children who grow up hearing language regularly will learn to speak earlier and will speak properly faster than kids who are rarely spoken to and/or who only hear the adults speak in that babbling baby talk. They also play the 'parrot game' which I loved.

I was impressed with Ma. That would be insanely hard. I can't imagine what it would be like, first to be taken from my home and family and trapped in a small 11x11 room with the only visitor being the creepy older man who kidnapped and rapes me, but to add onto that a baby?! I don't know if I could have done it. And, she's done an admirable job raising him given her circumstances and her resources. That takes a very strong woman, and even though she wasn't perfect (really, who is) she did a good job and she tried so hard. The only thing I could never figure out was why she didn't escape. I know that sounds harsh/unrealistic, especially given the state of the room she was trapped in. But the door was locked using a number keypad, one on the outside, and one on the inside. If I knew I was going to be trapped for an indefinite period of time, I'd start pushing buttons. What else are you going to do?! Or listen to the number tones and try to figure out which he pushes each night. I kind of think she could have done something. But, that's a small thing.

Overall, I was very impressed with this book. There were parts I didn't like, especially in the second half of the book, but for the most part, I loved it. I loved the word sandwiches and the way that Jack tried to take all the new information and assimilate it into ways he already understood. Overall, this is a book that makes you think, makes you wonder and makes you want to hug your kids a little closer. It's a strong book with a strong core of goodness to it. This is a book I would read again, just to hear Jack's voice.

Pick it up. I doubt you'll be sorry.

*Disclaimer: I received this book through Crazy Book Tours.

Youby Charles Beniot is... Wow... Ouch.

This book uses the 2nd person narrative, which is something that you don't see very often and it uses it incredibly well which is something seen even less. This narrative style brings you farther into the story, forcing you to connect to the characters differently. Although Kyle is the narrator, the use of the word 'you' makes you think more about yourself and how you would have reacted in Kyle's position. It's almost as if you stop reading the word 'you' and the story instead becomes about me.

In the authors note in the beginning, Benoit mentions that Kyle is neither bad nor good, he is typical. This makes a lot more sense once you've completed the story, because it's easy to understand how Kyle got to the position he's in when the book begins. There is something in this story that just about every can relate to at one point or another, and that makes it scarier, that much more intense, more real, and more personal. This makes the story all the more heartbreaking because of it's realism.

The characterizations were done very well. Many of them are not terribly likable, but each character has their own complexities and that thread of truth that makes this such an impactful novel. Especially Zack. When we are first introduced to Zack, I liked him. He was unique, and I figured he'd be a fun character to read about, initially, he almost makes a great 'good guy'. But then, we get to know him a little better and... shudder. I won't give anything away, because he's a character you really just need to meet for yourself, but ugh... Just be warned.

I also liked the emphasis (however 'underhanded' it may have been) on personal responsibility, and that Kyle acknowledged he really was responsible for his predicament and his placement. Throughout the story, several of the adults in Kyle's life talk about or make him think about his personal responsibility in his current position. I liked that Kyle accepted his responsibility (at least as much as teens are ever capable of fully accepting that responsibility...) and sometimes, it sounded like he really wanted to try a little harder.

The format was also quite interesting. We start at the end and are given a brief glimpse of a pivotal moment, one that sounds tragic (first line: "You're surprised at all the blood.") and then, it's as if the story rewinds, retracing the steps that brought Kyle and the mysterious 'him' to the moments in the beginning of the story with all the blood. It's a fast, intense race to the finish that leaves you a little bit gasping and empty once you've finally reached it. Grab yourself a copy of this book. It's important if you'll let it be.

*Disclaimer: I received this book through Around the World Tours.

Hope in Patience by Beth Fehlbaum was not an easy book to read, but it was definitely powerful. It's about Ashley, who spent the years from 9-15 suffering sexual abuse from her stepfather and neglect from her mother. After a particularly horrific night, she moves to Patience, Texas to life with the father she's never known and his family.

One of the things I most appreciated about this book is that Ashley isn't magically fixed because she's now in a loving environment with people who care about her, and has an understanding therapist who is helping her move on. Ashley is still a bit of an emotional wreck. She has good days, better moments and really bad times. There are still times when she crawls into her wardrobe to sleep, she sleeps much better with her door locked at night, she has trouble talking about what happened, and anything related to family, and she doesn't like to be touched.

I get really annoyed by books where problems are solved too easily, and there is no real conflict. Anyone who went through what Ashley did is going to experience side effects, some of which will likely never go away. Ashley is not one of those characters. Her pain is very real, still fresh and it's always close to the surface. With the help of her dad and her step-mom, both of whom are incredibly loving and supportive, she is starting to heal. Her rather unconventional therapist, Dr. "Matt" is also helpful. His moments surprised me. I've never heard of any of the techniques he used in therapy (drop kicking teddy bears) but it seems like he understands what is needed to connect to Ashley, and he uses that to reach her. And it helps. He helps break the 'spinning' where her mind rushes and rushes, immobilizing and terrifying her, he helps her learn to acknowledge her emotions instead of carving them out onto her skin, and he helps her begin to accept her past so that she can embrace her future.

The only complaint I have with this novel, is that I feel too many big 'issues' were tackled at once, and many of the characters used to illustrate that issue were just a little too one-dimensional. We saw people dealing with homosexuality and homophobia, religious zealots, racial prejudice, many small minds, chauvinists, and etc. I understand the point of these characters. It's more on the theme that you are not alone, and not the only with suffering. But, I felt that most of these characters had little, if any depth and it was almost too much. There were a few characters that I didn't think helped the story along, but most of the characters (even some of the 'flat' ones) helped Ashley in some way or another. So, overall even that's still positive.

I'm interested to see where else Ashley's story will take us. I didn't realize this until after I had finished the book, but this is actually the second book in Fehlbaum's Patience Trilogy. The first, Courage in Patience is, I believe, out of print and the third (still tentatively titled Living in Patience) will not be released until next year at the earlies. When I started Hope, I didn't feel like I had entered into the middle of the story, and the author gives us enough background that we aren't lost. As I said, I didn't even realize this was the second in a trilogy until I was searching the book on Goodreads. Whether you start at the beginning first, or just pick up this one, it's definitely a book I think is worth reading. I plan to look for the first in the series soon, and I'll be anxiously awaiting Ashley's conclusion.

I also feel like I need to mention that I think Ms. Fehlbaum is incredibly brave to have put this type of emotion and personal experience on paper, and let strangers read it. Congratulations. This is an amazing story. The pain is very real, but so is the hope. This is a story to say that you are not alone, that there is always hope.

*Disclaimer: I received this book through Traveling ARC Tours.

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist by Rachel Cohn and David Levithan is narrated alternately by both Nick and Norah.

For the most part, I enjoyed reading this book. It haven't read many books written by two different authors, but I was thrilled by how this book turned out. Both Nick and Norah were great characters, and their voices were incredibly unique. They were very developed as individuals, and I really enjoyed getting their separate interpretations of the night's events.

But, really, I kind of expected them to be strongly individual, because they were written by different authors, so it makes sense that they would sound different. What I thought was even better than Nick and Norah's characterization was the secondary characters, and the story arc. They both remained consistent throughout the whole story, regardless of who was actually narrating. The story didn't feel like it was being told in two different ways, like it often does when you have two people trying to tell the same story. It flowed and moved well, and read like one fluid story with two main characters/narrators. And, the secondary characters were each individual and unique, even when they didn't have a lot of face time.

It was a really fun story, if a little improbable. I had a hard time believing some of the things they went through would actually have happened, but once I got over that, I did enjoy the story. A lot of their silly antics made me chuckle a little to my self, or smile and there is just enough reality in the story to make it (almost) relateable. I enjoyed their reactions, thoughts and emotions, and thought the story had an almost whimsical quality that made it really fun to read. Except-

I probably would have given the story 4 stars (a pretty awesome rating) if it wasn't for the over use of the f-word. I hate that word. However, I understand that it's used fairly regularly by a lot of people. Even though I don't like the word, I understand it's used, and therefore can read/enjoy a story that uses that word. But, when it's written on almost every page, often multiple times per page, I find that I have a difficult time enjoying the story. I don't know anyone who uses any word that often. It's a little bit like it jolts me out of the story every time I read it. I can usually ignore it, but not when it's used that many times. And, I've felt this way before about certain other authors overuse of other words too. The fact that it's the f-word just makes it worse. So, both authors' prolific use of the f-word really got on my nerves. It made it really hard to enjoy the story, because I kept wishing they would use a different word. Seriously, I don't think it's really that hard to find a different (read-better) adjective/adverb/noun/verb than that one. Mix it up a little!

This Lullaby was my first foray into the world of Sarah Dessen. I've been hearing a lot about her for several years now, and almost everything I've heard is positive. So, I was browsing the library, looking for an impulse read, and I grabbed this one.

Remy is senior in high school, anxious for the end of the year when she can leave everything behind and go off to college. Her mom is a serial wife, getting ready for husband number 4 (or is it 5). So, Remy's life has been pretty crazy, and she's handled it by being a little wild. She's the love-em and leave-em type.

Enter Dexter. He's not like the normal guys Remy's dated, but he seems like he wants to stick around. He doesn't respond to her normal brush offs, and keeps popping up. He's definitely interested in Remy, but he's a musician and Remy doesn't date musicians. Ever. Her dad, who she's never met, was a musician and he wrote a hit song for her as an 'apology' for why he's not around.

This is a sweet story about growing up and learning new things about yourself and the people you thought you knew. I will say that I was surprised by the depth the story and the characters had. It wasn't entirely what I was expecting, and I discovered I really liked that.

Remy was a hard character for me to relate to, because her actions are completely foreign to me. I've never been the type to bounce around from boy to boy, relationship to relationship. It's just not a part of who I am. If my mom were like Remy's, if anything my reaction would be completely opposite. I'd just stop talking to boys. I doubt I'd date at all. I loved that strong relationship she and her friends shared, but I'm not totally sure I always believed that those 4, all with such different personalities would have been such great friends. And, I totally love the soda thing. Hahahaha...

Dexter was... interesting. I really liked Dexter and Remy together. A lot. But, before they started dating, I thought he was a bit of a nut. And not the good kind either, but the kind that makes me remember all the really weird people I've been around in my life. I laughed when Dexter approached Remy the first time, because she was really weirded out by how he acted, and I've been that girl before. Except, in my case, turns out the boy being all 'attentive/interested' didn't end up being just exactly what I needed/the greatest thing ever. Nope, he was kind of (a lot) a creep. So, I was wary of Dexter. But, once they started dating, I liked both characters a lot better. They just worked.

Remy's mom had a lot more strength and importance than I was expecting. Dessen sets you up really well to believe that Remy's mom is just a flighty man-needer with nothing to add to the story beyond being the reason Remy is so distrustful of men and love. But, there's more to her than that. When we (and Remy) realize this, it's a turning point in the story. I noticed it immediately, but it took Remy a little longer to understand what this was going to mean for her.

I did enjoy this book, although I can't say I loved it. It was was cute, but not overly memorable. I finished Just Listen right after this one, and liked it better (but more on that later). I definitely plan to read more by Dessen, but I am hoping I like the future reads more.

* Disclaimer: I received this book through Around the World Tours.

When the Stars Go Blue by Caridad Ferrer is all the cover suggests it to be — stunningly beautiful.

It is the story of Soledad, and passionate and gifted dancer, hurt by her past but full of life and love, and ready to give. It is the story of Jonathan, an intense and brilliant musician, damaged by his past and present and scared of the love he's giving. It is the story of Carmen, a sultry gypsy who jilts her jealous lover for another and meets with tragedy because of it.

Before you read this book, I strongly recommend familiarizing yourself with the story of Carmen. (Link takes you to Wikipedia page — which is a good place to start).

Soledad is asked by Jonathan to play the part of Carmen as a dancer in the drum and bugle corps he is a part of. She eventually agrees, largely in part because of her growing relationship and fascination with Jonathan. Their relationship quickly takes off, and it's easy to see why Soledad falls so hard for him so quickly. He's very attractive, understands her dedication and passion for dance, because he shares it for music, and he thinks she is the center of his world. It's a heady feeling to be the recipient of that much love and passion, and it's easy to understand how a young girl, experiencing love for the first time could get so wrapped up in him. Soledad is just as involved with Jonathan as he is with her. I enjoyed their relationship in the beginning, but it quickly started to scare me. Jonathan is just too intense. I would be worried for my daughter if she was involved with someone as intensely involved with and devoted to her as Jonathan is, especially at 18. Soledad becomes his world and he is possessive of her affection. He loses track of boundaries and his jealousy begins to consume his thoughts. It scares and confused and hurts Soledad because she doesn't understand why Jonathan is worried when she is so in love with him, and as devoted to him and he is to her.

I was beyond impressed with this book. Ferrer's writing is beautiful and haunting, bringing the world of dance and drum corps alive. I was involved in the band program all through school, and I've watched more than one corps perform. Ferrer captured the powerful emotions associated with that world perfectly. I could feel the chills with Soledad as she begins to learn what a corps is all about, and as she performs her routine successfully. I haven't really missed that part of my life before, but reading this story made me wish for it again.

The writing is beautiful, and the characterization is spot on. Ferrer has done a brilliant job creating multi-dimensional characters. There was not a single character I felt to be one-dimensional. Everyone had depth. The closest we come to a one-dimensional character is Jonathan's father, Marc. We learn early on that their relationship is rocky and it's easy to hate him. But as we learn more about what drives him, he's more understandable. I doubt anyone will ever like him, but I found his actions and reactions easy to believe. I've seen it before. Soledad has an amazing inner strength, one that I hope I share, but equally hope I'm never in a position to find that strength as Soledad was forced to. Jonathan appears to be perfect, in nearly every way but it doesn't take long to realize there is much buried within him, and far more than meets the eye. Raj, one of my favorite characters, describes him as one within whom still waters run deep and that becomes more and more clear as the novel progresses. Raj is good for Soledad, a close friend within the all-male corps who isn't a threat to her relationship with Jonathan, and someone who is always willing to listen and help where he can. He's also her partner, dancing as Don Jose (Carmen's jealous lover) throughout the show. Then, there's Taz. He is a Spanish soccer player, touring the United States with his Spanish team. At first, he seems a bit like just another cocky, good looking jock, but there's a lot more to him than that, and as we get to know him better, it's really easy to fall for him. Plus, he's just oozes hotness.

He is interested in Soledad and takes every opportunity to talk to her when their tours cross paths. Both teams are playing at many county fairs, so they see each other several times over the course of the tours. Each time they meet, Soledad is more and more intrigued by Taz, more interested and more drawn, and Jonathan becomes more jealous of their conversations and more possessive of her attention every time. It soon becomes complicated, and there is a sense of imminent danger. Something is about to happen, but what is unclear.

The story by itself was wonderful, but I believe it was made better by the ties it shares with Carmen. Too often when people use a previous story for inspiration, they merely retell the same story, adding a thing or two of their own, but leaving no doubt as to where the ideas came from. I don't like stories like that. I never have. I have to say, I was very impressed with the Carmen connections made, because it was easy to see the inspiration, but it was never over the top. It was still Ferrer's own story.

This is a book I think it would be a shame to miss. It has much to offer, was beautifully written and definitely captivating. The prose moves seamlessly, filled with gorgeous descriptions and evocative imagery. It's certainly a book to pick up, one that would be a great addition to almost any collection.

If I Stay by Gayle Forman is easily one of the best books I have read this year. It's an intensely personal story about the struggle of a young girl whose world is changed in the blink of an eye.

Mia's life is full. She's been very blessed. She has a wonderful boyfriend, is an incredibly talented Cellist and she has a wonderful close family who gets her. She is close to her parents and younger brother, in a way that few people are really able to experience, especially as a teenager. We are given just enough time in the beginning of the book to meet Mia's family and in those few pages, we are able to see the connection this family shares.

Her family is involved in a horrible accident, and Mia is rushed to the hospital in a coma. She watches everything around her trying to understand the changes to her life, and where to go from there. Because she realizes it's her choice. She can choose to live or die. And what would you decide?

The book is Mia's struggle to make that all important choice. The story is told in flashed between then and now. We switch between scenes with Mia and her family and friends in the hospital, and her memories of the important people in her life. We are introduced to everyone through Mia's memories as she lays in a coma in the hospital, in limbo between life and death. It's heart wrenching to watch as each loved one comes to her bedside to talk. They give her words of hope, love, encouragement, understanding, and peace. They plead for her to remain, even while understanding why it's so hard. Every page teams with emotion and every memory tears at your heart.

I won't go into detail about the complete impact and effect music has to this story other than to say it is essential to almost every character. Music is a way of life for these people and it's changed each of them. Mia's boyfriend Adam is in a band that might be about to make it big, Mia's been playing the Cello for years, her father used to be in a band and on and on.

The writing in this book is incredibly powerful. There is a genuine connection to each character and a realness that makes you believe in them. I would say that Forman is a genuinely gifted writer. I can't remember the last time I believed in people so much, felt so much like the people I was reading about were real. I had tears streaming down my face for the vast majority of the book, and I was unable to put it down. It's a short book, and I read it in one sitting, but that in no way takes away from its impact. This book is beyond a doubt powerful, emotional, and compelling. Never doubt that its important.

(Photo brought to you by the Idaho Meth Project)

(Will contain mild spoilers for Crank, so be warned of this if you haven't read it yet)
If possible, Glass by Ellen Hopkins is even more horrifying, socking and upsetting than its predecessor, Crank (click for review) . Crank shows us how Kristina becomes addicted to 'the monster' — meth. At the end of the book, it seems like Kristina is getting her life back. She is trying to give up the drugs so her unborn child will have a chance of being born normal. Although it's hard, she seems to be doing well.

Glass begins a short time later. Her son, Hunter, is a few months old and Kristina is tired all the time, and she's tired of feeling fat and unattractive. Life begins to feel like too much for her, and she falls back into old habits. She tells herself she is in control, and can handle the drug, and she won't let it handle her. She's confident she can maintain control. Well... She's wrong. The drug grabs hold of her and takes her farther down than she's ever gone before. She loses control quickly and is a danger to herself and to others around her.

It was heart breaking watching Kristina destroy herself and leave those who love her behind. She is an incredibly selfish character, one who refuses to think beyond her own desires. She again becomes involved with the 'wrong crowd', finding people who supply her habit, and make it glamorous.

I found this book to be more powerful and dissuasive than Crank because we are able to watch the complete deterioration of Kristina's life. She completely loses control and doesn't even notice. We watch Kristina as she becomes involved, directly or indirectly with drug trafficking, neglectful/semi-abusive parenting, prostitution, theft, and more.

I can't describe to you how powerful this story is, and again, the free verse style used by Hopkins is brilliant and perfect. I don't think there is a better way to have told this story. This is an important book, one I think should be made readily available to teens. It saddens me that this book has been banned or challenged by people, because it is important. Drugs and the problems it creates aren't going to go away just because you refuse to look at them. If anything, this guarantees that they will be around longer, and that they will only get worse. Both Crank and Glass so us clearly why drugs should be avoided. It's fearful, intense and horrifying. And, I think a lot of the power comes from knowing that some of what's contained here and written comes from personal experience. The author has lived through a lot of this pain and is trying to provide a way for others to avoid that same hurt.

*Disclaimer: I received this book through Around the World Tours.

When I first started hearing about The Duff: Designated Ugly Fat Friend by Kody Keplinger, I wasn't sure I'd like it. I wasn't sure it was the type of book I'd enjoy, so I kind of pushed it to the back of my mind. But, I kept hearing more and more about it, and everything I was hearing was positive, so when I had the chance to read it, I decided I'd give it a try. Big smile.:)

Reading the description of the book, a girl who gets into an enemies-with-benefits relationship to escape her problems, and then falls for him sounded like the high school version of a really cheesy romance novel, which I don't read. But The Duff has so much more than that to offer. It's about growing up, good friends, and accepting who you are.

Keplinger is a talented writer. Her characters are authentic and their reactions were always believable. Reading Bianca's thoughts totally brought me back to high school. When I would roll my eyes at her 'oh so witty banter' I had to stop and cringe because I've been there, thinking I'm so smart until an hour later when I think about how dumb I really sounded. (or listening to my little brother use the same arguments on my parents and thinking, wow... did I really sound that dumb?!)

I think the character I liked the most was Wesley. Not because he was the most likable character in the story, or anything, but because I actually liked him by the end. He is one of the reasons I was sort of avoiding the book. I didn't think I would ever like him, and when I started the book it reinforced that idea. He's a bit of a pig with a vastly over inflated sense of his own importance. But, as Bianca got to know him and started to realize that maybe he is a human being with a heart after all, I started to like him. He's got his own set of troubles, and while they don't excuse his bad behavior, it definitely makes his actions more understandable.

Bianca was also a wonderful character. She's more than a little cynical, but she's also fiercely loyal and protective of those she loves. She's a strong character made stronger by the fact that she doesn't really know how to handle everything that is currently happening to her. She does spend a little too much time trying to just run away from the problems, but we've all been there. I loved her realization toward the end of the book, and the message that 'duff' is a relative term and that everyone goes through the same self esteem issues at one point or another.

The only part of the book that I can genuinely say I didn't much care for was toward the end with Wuthering Heights. It just felt like a little bit too much, and I felt myself rolling my eyes throughout that whole section. The only thing that redeemed that passage for me was that Bianca herself acknowledged that she was being a little bit ridiculous.

Overall, it's a light, fun read with a surprising amount of depth and a cast of wonderfully drawn, very real characters.

American Born Chinese by Gene Luen Yang won the Printz Award in 2007. Before picking up this book, I had never before read a graphic novel, so I didn't quite know what to expect. I was hopeful though, because I had been hearing a lot of really great things about it. So, what did I think?

I was pleasantly surprised that I really enjoyed reading this as a graphic novel. The illustrations really added a lot to the reading. I don't know why, but I expected the illustrations to be a nice addition to the story, but not necessary to the story itself. I started reading it that way to, giving the illustrations only a cursory glance. It didn't take me long to realize that I was missing a lot of the story that way, so I slowed down and gave each page of illustrations as much attention as I gave the words. And all I can say is, Wow! It amazed me how much emotion and action you can get across to the reader in one small frame. That one illustration is able to convey an emotion or message, thought or feeling in just seconds, while it would have taken several sentences or a paragraph to give that same feeling using only words.

I really liked the graphic novel aspect and will definitely be searching out more in the future. However, I had also heard a lot of positive comments from people who simply gushed about this book. This was harder for me, because I didn't love this book the way so many others seemed to. The book uses three seemingly unrelated storylines to tell us our story. It begins with my favorite of the three, the tale of the Monkey King. He becomes a master of all sorts of Kung Fu, but is unhappy because the other gods will not accept him as an equal, no matter what he does, because he is a monkey, not a man. Next, we meet our main character, Jin Wang. He struggles to find his place, just wanting to fit in and be accepted for who he is. The final storyline (and my least favorite) is young Danny and his cousin Chin-Kee. Danny is the all-american high schooler; good looking, basketball player (bla bla bla) while Chin-Kee is the epitome of the negative Chinese stereotype.

The three stories are told individually, and at first there doesn't seem to be any connection between the three. As we approach the end of the book, the three story lines do pull together to create one larger story. I really liked the idea of pulling all three story lines together, but didn't love the way it happened. Almost all my disappointment in this novel revolves around the Danny and Chin-Kee storyline. I just feel that I missed a little bit of what they were actually trying to say. I understood the message and the importance of that segment, but there are a few details left over that weren't really clear to me. I don't want to ruin the ending, so I won't specify but a little more clarity would have been nice. A few things at the end just seemed to happen. Almost like they popped out of nowhere. (I'm looking at you Wei-Chen) Some of it was just a little too much for me to comfortably grasp, and I wasn't really able to give it the necessary suspension of disbelief in its entirety.

Overall, I must say that I did really enjoy American Born Chinese. It was a very interesting glimpse of what it must be like to grow up different from everyone around you, especially when it's very likely they already have a preconceived (negative) notion about you. There are a lot of life lessons hinted at in this book that many people would do well to learn.

Anyone else read this one? Tell me what you think!

Nickel Plated by Aric Davis is the story of Nickel, a 12 year old who ran away from foster care 2 years ago and has been living on his own since then. He supports himself by growing pot and selling it to high school students and blackmailing pedophiles he finds in internet chat rooms. He also does private detective (esque) work on the side for people referred to him through word of mouth. Adults he charges. Kids, he helps for free.

I'm still not completely sure how I felt about this one. I loved the premise — 12 year old boy: anti-hero, hero, vigilante. I also have to admit that I kind of liked that Nickel targeted pedophiles. People who hurt children make me sick. So I was very interested to see how that angle would be handled. While I liked the idea of this book, I'm still not sure how I feel about the execution.

Nickel was a little bit too good at what he did for me to believe him. He is 12. I get that he's had a really tough life. I get that kids are stronger, smarter, and more capable that adults often give them credit for. I know that extreme situations or circumstances find a way of drawing more out of us than we thought we had to give. I get it. But I have a really hard time believing that a 12 year old kid is capable of doing everything that Nickel does throughout the book. And too many things just fell into his lap. Too many pieces of the puzzle were just sort of handed to him. It was just a little bit too far-fetched for me to believe.

I also felt a bit of disconnect throughout the whole story. You read the book, and you hear these horror stories from Nickel, see into this horrid cesspool of humanity, but I never felt like it was emotional. Nickel earns an income from blackmailing pedophiles he finds in internet chat rooms. He does this because of his past, so that no other kid will ever have to live through the horrors he's had to deal with. And sure, we are told about a shudder here, or a oft repressed memory there, but I never felt Nickel's emotions here. It was all telling. We are told that Nickel could probably use a hug, would like a mom and misses his dad something fierce. But it's never really felt. It's like Nickel thinks if he talks about the emotions enough he will start to feel them, but he doesn't, not really.

But, even though there were a few things that I struggled with while reading this book, overall I did really like it. I think the book would have been a little more believable had Nickel been 14 instead of 12, because a lot changes in those 2 years, and a lot of maturing takes place. His thoughts and reactions to all things female would have been more believable (I have yet to meet a 12 year old who finds adult women 'hot'.) But Nickel really was a great character. He genuinely wants to make sure that other kids have a better life, to make sure that none of these other kids every have to suffer through the hellish childhood he had. When he was talking about other kids, and making them safer, that is where I felt like Nickel was real. There were sometimes I didn't necessarily believe his emotions, but never when talking about protecting kids. It breaks my heart that this 12 year old kid feels so responsible for others, feels so much like he must be the protector. Someone needs to give that boy a hug.

Books like this make me want to become a foster parent, when I reach a stage of life where I'd be able to. I want to take kids like this and prove to them that not everyone is bad, that not everyone will hurt them. Nickel needs that. He's done an admirable job of living on his own, and taking care of himself, but there are some things that a kid that age should never have to worry about. It hurts that he does.

So, overall, even though there were some things about this book that didn't necessarily work perfectly, it's definitely one that I am glad I read, one that I will recommend, and although I don't know if there are any plans for a sequel, I would definitely be willing to read about Nickel in the future. It's a story with a solid core, and Davis has potential as a writer. There is some stuff that needs to be tightened up, or fine-tuned, but I can really see Davis growing as a writer in the future, and I wouldn't mind watching him grow as a writer as Nickel grows as a character.

GIVEAWAY-


I also have a copy of this book available for one commenter! Leave a comment with your email address, and you could win a copy of the book!:)


The contest will be open until next Wednesday, April 20 at 11:59pm. Sorry International followers, but this is US only.