Fall for Anything by Courtney Summers is the kind of book I've always loved, but haven't read much of lately — contemporary fiction, with a protagonist full of painful somethings, struggling to add balance back into their world. (How's that for vague?;) )
Eddie is reeling from the suicide of her father, struggling to understand why he could do something like this. His suicide note was vague and Eddie is left needing to know why her father felt the need to end his own life. Her mother hasn't gotten dressed in anything except his bathrobe since he died, let alone remember to go grocery shopping or take care of Eddie, so Beth, her mom's best friend, moves in temporarily to try and help out. But, although she means well, I seriously wanted to slap her. She isn't helpful. Almost everything she says/does makes things harder on Eddie, and increases the weight pressing against her shoulders. Eddie is already in a pretty black place. She doesn't need the judgements of her mom's best friend making things worse.
Her best friend, Milo, wants to help her, but she is keeping part of herself back right now, and she also knows that Milo is keeping something from her about the night her father died, information Eddie feels is necessary for her to begin understanding why her father did what he did.
Then, Eddie meets Cullen. He was a photography student of her father's and they sort of share grief. Eddie is desperate for someone she can relate to, who also feels a gaping loss and needs to know why, so she latches on to Cullen and makes some pretty reckless decisions.
Milo is awesome. He is just a rock solid best friend, trying to be there for Eddie when she needs him while he is also struggling through some changing emotions. He's not sure how to help Eddie, and you can definitely sense the pain he's in, because he doesn't know how to help. Cullen was a strange character, right from the start, and he's one I was never quite sure how I was supposed to feel about. Initially, I liked him because he seemed to be someone for Eddie to share pain with as a way to heal. But then, I honestly believe that Cullen became toxic. Thinking about him now makes me shudder. And yet, he isn't necessarily a bad person, just seriously misguided and maybe a little deranged.
The pain in this book was so real it's palpable. I loved that photography was such an integral part of this story, because, to me, reading this book was like looking at a particularly powerful photograph. It's so real you can almost reach out and touch it, but it's also one of the more distant art forms, because no matter how intimate the shot, the photographer is removed from the subject and only has contact with the lens. I don't know if that makes as much sense to you as it does to me, but I definitely felt like it could not have been done better.
I hadn't read anything by Courtney Summers before picking this up, but I ended up buying a copy of Cracked Up to Be a few days after finishing this one because I was so amazed and wowed by the story. It's a heartbreaking story made powerful by the writing and a couple weeks later, the story still leaves me reeling every time I think about it.
The ending was just as powerful as the rest of the story, and I was left with a feeling of rightness. Not everything was completely resolved and it isn't even a particularly happy ending. But, that's life. Real life doesn't come with wrapping paper and bows for our struggles, so books about pain shouldn't either.
If you haven't read this book yet and you enjoy contemporary YA I think you are seriously missing out. It's raw, emotional and powerful. It's going to make you uncomfortable. It will make you wonder, and it kind of blurs a few lines between right and wrong, but it makes you think and it makes you feel, and I don't know what else you can ask from a book.
*Disclaimer: This book was received through Around the World Tours.